06 April 2010

Gossip: 3 Ways To Stop It | Patricia Rossi

Gossip: 3 Ways To Stop It | Patricia Rossi

Please watch this quick one-minute video

I’m going to talk about something very scary; it has six letters and starts with a G. It’s simply frightening. This villain, Mr. G, can:

  • Kill careers
  • Break hearts and
  • Ruin sacred friendships

We’re talking about Gossip. We have all done it or cracked our necks in half, craning to hear it. Let’s square off with ourselves to eradicate gossip from our lives. We especially need to cut loose the slippery fancy forms of gossip we use to seem sympathetic, concerned, or to deem our gossipy selves innocent.

Example: “That poor Ted, bless his heart, sure is ballooning up. He needs to back away from the buffet,” or, “Please pray for Sally. She’s on her fourth plastic surgery and starting to look like a drag queen!”

No matter how we dress it up with feigned concern, and/or, “Bless their hearts,” it’s still gossip.

So let’s kick the habit!!! We could read a great book and talk about it, plant a tree and nurture it, or make a wonderful meal and share the recipe. If we are really feeling courageous and open, we could look at why gossip has such an addictive pull in our lives. What are we evading, masking, or trying to fill up in ourselves with gossip? But I’m often asked what to do, when people are gossiping about the Ted’s and Sallies of the world.

There are three ways to stop gossip:

  1. Change the subject by asking a positive question. “I love the shirt you are wearing. Please share with me where you got it.”
  2. You can be direct. “It’s really not cool to gossip about Sallie. She’s not here to defend herself, so let’s take this issue to her together and see if we can resolve it.”
  3. My favorite retort to gossip goes like this: “OH Lord! I have way too much to fix in myself to use up my valuable energy and time gossiping about Sallie.” You can even kick in, “What type of things are you working on in your life?” That question usually makes people shell-shocked, like they’ve just spotted J-Lo, the twelve disciples, and Tiger Woods at The Cheesecake Factory.

So if you have a hankering to gossip, pretend it will be written in the sky for all to see, or do what I do and chant to yourself, Gossip makes you ugly. Gossip makes you ugly. Because we all know what we put out there will hurl back to us at warped speed. So, make a habit of building people up when they aren’t present. Then watch you hopes, goals, and life shine like a new dime.

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